(Brandon) (aka Branbaby) is a worshipper of the god Beautiful_liesBeautiful_lies AKA Sarahmon and female dugong. He is her minion and also goes by the name SephithSephith.

Character Overview


Bwandon is a female dugong. :) Here is a picture of him looking for food!

Bran told me he was vacuuming earlier… I guess I now know that HE was the hoover. XDDD

Doesn't he make such a ruggedly attractive female dugong? *melt*

He wants a root because he is stirred. XD

Is in a relationship with a penis shaped root.


Here it is.


See the character overview? That about explains it. He's a female sea cow! XD

Appearance and Physical Traits

Once again, go back up to the character overview.

What an adorable female dugong! Sea cows are so cute!

Close your eyes and picture an afro too. You can't forget about the afro.


Once upon a time, Bwandon was a baby sea cow.


This hot Australian gave birth to him and thought he was the most adorable thing EVER! Branbaby was born out his mum's butt where he had been gestating in his bowels. This means all this snuxxxling might just make him have a sea cow XD

However, this hot Australian guy without a name already had 72 other sea cow babies. He couldn't afford to have another.

That's why he shipped him up to South Carolina, where he became the first ever dugong to live in the state… with no ocean.

Branbaby yearns for his ocean home Down Under, which why he is often found at the bottom of pools sucking off the grime for lunch.

This is why Branbaby has such a fancination for the Aussie accent, a weakness exploited by Sarahmon when she took him for her pet.

And when given the chance, Kwys likes to take him for walks in circles. Which is epic because he has no legs. Dogs like to chase him. He doesn't like that very much so he tries to suck their faces… it doesn't work very well. XD

;-) I heard rumors that there's a statue dedicated to him too. But it was made by an abstract artist so we aren't entirely sure if it is a dugong or just a really big potato. *shrug*

Powers and Abilities


Bwandon the dugong has the ability to swim… epically!


He can suck up things in a single suck! XD

Elvis Channeling

Elvis lives on in you Bran! Seriously, hearing you sing hound dog is just, domg.

Weaknesses and Handicaps

Australian Accents

Can be used to great effect to get him to do what the speaker wants, he is so dazzled by sheer awesome that he can't function.


Don't ask. We don't.

Silly sea cow and his pedophilia.

Ohhh Branndoonn, pedophillia!! PEDOPHILIA OHH



His afro has the ability to crush people. :(

Other Female Sea Cows

He looks them up on google. Just ask him.

Sarahmon thinks this predilection for pedophilic porpoise porn in unpardonable!!!



Branbaby is Sarah's little pet. He loves to worship the ground that she walks on. In return, she makes sure he is properly fed and allows him to have all the pedophilia and Australian accents he wants. This is why she is always talking to him because her accent is epic. ^_^


Is his vacuum pimp XDDD


  • Kwys is going to start lending him to people as a vacuum cleaner for cash. In a way, he's going to be a hooker and Kwys is his pimp. He performs services and gets paid and Kwys takes all the money. XD
  • Kwys also hopes a dog eats him.

Basic Bio

(This section is the basic profile. Once I figure out how to make this stinking table "float" correctly so that it can be placed on the side anywhere in the article, with text wrapping around it (don't worry if you didn't understand what the hell I just said,) this basic profile is going to sit here at the bottom of the article. This is mainly just a good, quick reference on a character. You can look at it and find, say, their birthday, without having to look through the whole article. The basic bio is a small "table," and if you want to start a new line
Then you will have to add _ to the end of a line. So, for example:

Will generate this in the table


Brandon Elvis Brown (hehehe)
First Appearance: 2 years ago
Played By: SephithSephith
Voiced by: Brandon) ((Brandish))
Name Meaning: Sea cow
Aliases: Branbaby, Goof, blah, fruitcake
Age: Old
D.O.B.: Ages ago
Species: Bwandong (a dugong with an afro)
Height: Short
Weight: Scrawny
Blood Type: Black
Hair: Afro
Eyes: Brown
Ethnicity: Milk Chocolate
Sun Sign: Cappy
Chinese Zodiac: Snake
Occupation: Henchman and adorable dugong.
Hobbies: Doing Sarahmon's bidding
Relatives: An awesome mummy
Birthplace: Australia! His mommy is a hot Australian guy and he has 72 brothers and sisters!
Residence: America (Ewww)
Abilities: …. Um…. wait!! Uh… I got nothing
Weaknesses: Pedophilia! XDDD
… and the fact that he's a female sea cow. XDDD
Weapon: Afro tentacles!
Theme: (YouTube link character theme songs)

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